Attention trick or treaters, members of Cats, strippers, casino hosts and comic book characters. There is a strong likelihood that your kitty outfit sucks. If Taylor Swift can’t pull it off, why should you? And almost none of them are memorable. For everyone who isn’t Ertha Kitt or Julie Newmar, we have provided the following guide to making your attempt at feline adornment less of a travesty.
Rule #1: Props are key.
A big cat is the best prop.
Extra points are awarded for matching your feline companions.
All points are lost for flagrant mismatches.
If you can’t match the cat, dress as something the cat would
like to play with.
Rule #2: You are dressing as a cat because you would rather be
cute than original.
No cat outfit is all that scary.
If you want to be intimidating, choose another theme.
Rule # 3: Cat outfits can be enhanced through nudity. However, if you are resorting to nudity, you can probably skip the cat outfit.
Rule # 4: The whole kitty routine can be overdone.
Rule #5: Cat outfits are easy to screw up.
Avoid black. Pointed ears are better than floppy ears.
Avoid talking about your weaknesses.
Rule # 6: No matter how well executed it may be, a kitty outfit is just a kitty outfit.
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